There’s the ‘Too Many Opinions’ Problem in Wedding Planning

Now, everyone can agree that it feels next to impossible to do wedding planning in a fun and stress-free way. There’s just a lot of factors that go into it, so that makes sense. But what’s maybe the most stressful bit about wedding planning is literally everyone else’s opinion that doesn’t even matter to begin with. Maybe it starts innocently. Like someone asks a question, someone else offers a suggestion, then someone’s aunt has “always dreamed” of a certain colour palette, and now the whole thing feels like trying to please a committee.

And yeah, people usually mean well. But also, there’s a level of audacity that shows up around weddings that is honestly impressive. Because at the end of the day, it’s not their wedding. It’s not their timeline. It’s not their budget. It’s not their photos. So why are they acting like a co-producer, right?

While you ideally shouldn’t be burning bridges during this time, it’s honestly more about just trying to keep the day feeling like the couple’s day, while handling family input without losing the plot. But how can you even do that, though?

Why Does Everyone Have Something to Say?

Yeah, what’s with the entitlement here? Well, weddings hit people in the feelings. Like parents remember their own wedding, or they remember what they thought their wedding would be. Usually, other relatives bring tradition into it.  Friends might have a thing to say, too. Plus, someone’s thinking about what guests will say, someone’s thinking about what the pictures will look like, someone’s thinking about what’s “proper,” because of course they are. Yeah, you get the idea here. 

And sometimes opinions also come from money. If someone’s contributing financially, they might feel like they’ve earned a say (which is debatable). Now, one thing to keep in mind here is that it doesn’t mean they get to run the show, but it does mean the conversation can get more sensitive.

Use a Decision Filter So Every Suggestion Doesn’t Become a Debate

Honestly, one of the easiest ways to handle too many opinions is to have a filter for decisions. There’s some choice, but not a lot of choice. Basically, a simple rule like, “Does this feel like the couple?” or “Does this make the day easier for guests?” cuts through a lot of noise. Also, yes or no questions or narrowing things down helps too, like getting help choosing one wedding venue out of three choices, something like that. Some people do similar when it comes to wedding attire, especially the bridal gown. 

How Do You Respond without Starting a Family War?

You can’t always keep things civil, and yes, sometimes you have to burn bridges as awful as it is. But not everyone wants that, of course. Start with a quick acknowledgement, then redirect to something else. Plus, it helps when practical reasons are being used because they give people something to accept, even if they don’t love it. 

Okay, sure, but sometimes people just won’t drop it and demand their way. Sometimes it’s just about repetition, and they’ll eventually get the idea that they won’t get their way. But just be sure to be calm, though (which is easier said than done, obviously).

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Becky

Meet the award-nominated UK lifestyle blogger behind Spirited Puddle Jumper – a mum of three living in South East London! Becky shares the real ups and downs of family life, parenting tips, and lifestyle inspiration, proving that being a mum doesn’t mean you stop being fun or having other interests! Follow along for honest insights into UK family life and opinions on a whole range of topics, from travel and food, to beauty reviews, home and DIY, business and health and wellness.