*The article is developed in partnership with BetterHelp
Guilt: it’s that nagging feeling you get after doing something that you regret or failing to live up to certain expectations placed on you by others or even yourself. While guilt isn’t a fun feeling, it’s a necessary and adaptive emotion meant to help us make the right choices. However, too much guilt can be unhealthy, especially when it isn’t warranted.
Guilt can be a heavy burden to carry, and even if you feel you’ve done something wrong, it’s important to look after yourself by finding ways to let go of that weight. Here, we’ll go over some of the potential causes of guilt and discuss how you can free yourself from its grip.
What Is Guilt?
Guilt is a feeling of self-consciousness that you may experience when feeling responsible for some negative outcome in your own life or someone else’s. Although it’s not a positive feeling, it can be highly motivating, causing you to make changes in your behaviors to avoid feeling it again. Guilt runs on a spectrum, from mild discomfort to severe unhappiness. Excessive and/or unreasonable amounts of guilt can even lead to depression or anxiety, making it easy to get stuck in a cycle of negativity.
Reasons For Guilt
There are many reasons you might feel guilty, including:
- Survivor’s guilt
- Not living up to certain standards
- Hurting someone
- Feeling like an inadequate parent
- Going against your values or morals
- Trauma
- Not spending enough time with friends or family
- Failing to keep your word
- Being constantly blamed
- Growing up with high standards in place
- Not being able to provide for loved ones
The potential causes of guilt are endless, and surely not confined to this list. It’s crucial to be able to narrow down why you feel guilty, as overcoming these feelings often requires taking some type of action to mend the situation. If you’re still feeling unsure about the root cause of your guilt, consider seeking more information with the following online resource: www.betterhelp.com/advice/guilt/understanding-why-you-are-wracked-with-guilt/.
How To Let Go Of Guilt
Letting go of guilt often requires finding its source and then using different strategies to overcome it. The following are several tips and tricks you can utilize to begin this process.
- Make amends as needed: If you’re feeling guilty because of something you did or said, an apology may be in order. Expressing your genuine regret and taking accountability for your actions can help ease any pain someone else may be feeling, and they may even offer forgiveness to you.
- Talk about it: Reaching out to a trusted friend or family member to talk about your feelings can be incredibly healing. While you may not be able to offer compassion to yourself quite yet, a loved one may be able to stand in the gap until you get there. They can remind you of all of the good things about you and provide encouragement and support as you work through your feelings.
- Practice self-compassion: It’s critical to remember that no one is perfect, including you. Everyone makes mistakes sometimes, and we all fall short of our goals or wishes for ourselves. This makes us human. Recognize that even though you may have flaws, that doesn’t make you any less of a person who’s worthy of second chances, compassion, and forgiveness.
- Go to therapy: Sometimes, guilt may feel so heavy that it begins to negatively impact your mental health and daily functioning. In these cases, speaking with a mental health professional, like a therapist, could be beneficial. They can help you uncover the source of your guilt, equip you with coping strategies, and guide you toward self-compassion and acceptance.
Other people may not always offer forgiveness, which may make it more difficult for you to stop being so hard on yourself and move on. However, if you’ve genuinely apologized and given your best effort at making amends, know that there isn’t anything else you can do but give it time. While it’s challenging to be in this situation, it can also allow you to experience personal growth by teaching you how to embrace your imperfections.
Conclusion
Guilt may be a complex emotion, but it can be productive when harnessed for the right reasons. Actively seeking to improve yourself and treat others with more respect shows that you’re moving in the right direction. If you’re struggling to let go of guilt, remember that the more you’re able to forgive yourself, the more compassion you can extend to other people. Moving past guilty feelings can be a process, so try to be patient with yourself on the journey, and don’t be afraid to ask for extra support. Guilt may be a challenging emotion, but it’s not impossible to overcome when you have the right mindset and tools.
